Pergi opis abah

Assalamualaikum people. Random. Saje show off gambar dengan my sis and family.

Sekian. Wassalam. :)

#mlm ne malaysia vs Thailand. sila doakan! *debardebar*

Contengan Maya - Hazie N

ASSALAMUALAIKUM wbt

*smile everybody*

Aku dah tak suka dia aka xxxxx. Percayalah

Sunyi?

Mungkin. Tapi buat apa nak kisah sangat sunyi tanpa perhatian manusia.

Tanpa perhatian manusia tu tak apa. Jangan sunyi dari perhatian dan kasih Allah.

Kalau hidup tanpa kasih Allah, parah. KOSONG

Tentu rasanya lebih teruk daripada apa yang aku rasa sekarang ni. Aku yakin sangat

Aku nak apa daripada manusia? Depa takboleh bagi apa. Semua daripada Allah jua

Dengan manusia tak ada jaminan. Nak-nak kalau yang stok cinta pura-pura. Confirm kecewa

Manusia ne tak sempurna. Kadang-kadang bukan dia sengaja nak buat aku kecewa. Dah memang tak suka takkan nak paksa? Kan dah ~ tak pasal-pasal, aku yang kecewa

Based on pengalaman lalu, sekarang aku nak kejar cinta yang sempurna. Tentulah cinta Allah

Cinta manusia tak tentu lagi hala tujunya tambah pulak cinta yang tak halal 

TAPI cinta Allah bawa ke syurga kalau kita bersungguh kejar rahmat dan redhaNYA

Sekarang, aku tak ada dia, tapi DIA tetap ada-forever. Itu pasti

Aku hambaNYA, bila aku berdoa dan perlukanNYA, DIA akan datang pada aku. Itu janjiNYA.

"dan apabila hamba-hambaku bertanya kepadamu tentang Aku, maka (jawablah) Aku adalah dekat.

Aku mengabulkan permohonan orang yang berdoa apabila dia memohon kepadaKu, maka hendaklah mereka itu memenuhi (segala perintah) Ku, hendaklah mereka beriman kepadaKu agar mereka selalu berada dalam kebenaran" (al-Baqarah:186)

[notakaki] takde kaitan dengan orang lain taw mende neh. lebih kepada refleksi dan lebih kepada monolog dalaman aku before tengok bola tadi (Malaysia vs Thailand) yang aku nak kongsikan bersama. ^^' kalau Hlovate boleh buat Contengan Jalanan, maka malam ne aku pulak dah buat Contengan Maya dekat blog sendiri. ecewahhh.

WASSALAM

*I love all of you*

Respond to what are related to the story

Assalamualaikum
good morning!
and salam 1 Malaysia.

So tgh malam gini. Aku nak sambung dengan entri aku yang lepas - Read & Relate
and here we goes to another new version of it.
Kalau sebelum ini, whatever quote yang aku rasa suit to my story aku memang menyokong je semedang,
kalini it'll be more to against it. kinda laaa. *menggelabah je*

99% in progress. Well lets wait a little bit longer. 

Frankly, it is so like you

It is not the end of the world. The woe you've create, it's healed

Then, let kills the memories first

Never. Neither you nor me will miss each other's presence. I am sure

We could be just friend, the way you always wanted. 

No doubt. But still, I am talkative

YKW, I am not that silly anymore

Once. Yes you did. But you're fake

Dah lama kann aku tak main dengan quote segala bagai ne. Saje suka-suka sebab hakikatnya aku memang suka pun quote semedang gini. Related? Most of it is related but in a different way lahh.

Assalamualaikum. 

TARBIAH

Tarbiah di sekolah,

oleh naqib naqibah dan badan dakwah.

Tarbiah di rumah,

oleh umi abah dan mak ayah.

Tarbiah dengan bi'ah,

oleh kawan dan pengalaman.

Boleh juga ditarbiah,

dengan tazkirah, ceramah dan kuliah,

juga digerakkan melalui majalah dan bahan ilmiah.

Tarbiah ajar erti hijrah,

hari yang kelam pastikan cerah,

tarbiah adalah uslub dakwah

Indahnya hidup ditarbiah

Mengenang dosa; hati jadi resah

Mendapat tenang kerana ingatkan Allah.

Yang mana terputus tali kebergantungan hati padaNYA, Ilahi

melalui tarbiah, disambungkan kembali

Agar hati dan rohani yang sakit, terawat tak mati.

Tarbiah tetap hidup walau waktu berhenti,

Tarbiah perlu diimarahkan sehari-hari

unttuk diraih redha ya Rabbi

buat diri dan demi ukhrawi.

tengah-tengah malam ni tiba-tiba rasa nak berpuitis pulak dah. = =' kononnya lah,

walhal tak puitis langsung. aku tahuu tu. Tapi aku harap mesej dalam nukilan aku ni sampailah hendaknya

buat aku sendiri dan mereka yang membaca; In shaa Allah. Tarbiah itu penting. noted.

Aku cakap based on experience *taktipu* (:

[notakaki] nukilan ne inspired by Contengan Jalanan (I-Fend) oleh Hlovate sebenarnya. Right now tengah otw membaca kisah kedua - Ksquare pulak. 

ASSALAMUALAIKUM

love you guys in the name of Islam.

Morning! *and still so hungry act.*

A short note and it's a random - mess - online - jurnal

Assalamualaikum people.

This is so random. Tiba-tiba terasa nak menaip.
Nak menaip tentang apakah? Draft entry pon tarak buat, serius memang tak prepare.

It's already 2 in the morning.
Kalau umi tahu confirm dah dileteri anak sulungnya ini dgn penuh kasih sayang. ecewahh..
Just now, yang melekakan aku sebenarnya adalah Contengan Jalanan - Hlovate.
Tak sampai separuh pun lagi.
Tapi dah rasa serasi dengan jiwa.
Hlovate, she's gifted. Eh, she? main belasah je aku neh = ='

Dalam sehari dua ni, even kehidupanku dan rutin aku berjalan macam biasa...
aku tetap terfikir dia. Bukan terfikir untuk jatuh suka semula.
Cuma berfikir, sampai bila aku boleh bertahan? Adakah ending bagi loveless story aku dapat diakhiri dgn baik? am I truly 100% dah bebas dari cengkaman kejiwangan yang melanda tangkai jiwa? *ayat hyperbola* Aku harap jawapan  untuk soalan-soalan ini adalah ya. cuma tak dinafikan aku agak risau sekiranya jawapannya tidak.Itu je sebenarnya. no biggie.

pon begitu, sebagai langkah berjaga - jaga utk kentalkan hati dan perasaan, aku baca entry islamik aku sendiri and cari support dari buddies serta dapatkan bhn bacaan yg mendidik rohani. so aku rasa, progress sgt baik buat masa terdekat ni. risau aku neh. saje nak menggelabah agaknya. still, Praise be to Allah, alhamdulillah laa untuk hati yang lebih tenang skrg ini (:

kelabu.
tak tahu sebenarnya point aku menaip entry malam ne.
macam xde isi pokok je.
bunga je lebih.
talk crap dgn susunan ayt yang pffttt.

assalamualaikum people. aku tidur dulu. right now; 2:22 am.
ADIOS

Laa Ilaaha Ilallah 2

Assalamualaikum. 

dikongsikan artikel neh dari Nayzak. [link boleh usya dekat side bar blog]

artikel neh adalah sambungan dari entry Laa ilaaha illallah yang sebelum ne.

In shaa Allah. sama-sama kita perteguh akidah dan perkuat keyakinan kpd NYA ^^

*sambil tuh boleh improve reading skill utk MUET juge*

 4. "Where is God?"

 Answer:
Some other religions teach that "God is everywhere." This is actually called "pantheism" and it is the opposite of our believe system in Islam. Allah tells us clearly that there is nothing, anywhere in the universe that resembles Him, nor is He ever in His creation. He tells us in the Quran that He created the universe in six "Yawm" (in Arabic, it means a 'periods of time') and then He "Istawa 'Ala Al Arsh" (rose up, above His Throne). He is there (above His Throne) and will remain there until the End Times.


 5. "Why did God create everything?"

 Answer:
Allah says in His Qur'an that He did not create all of this for any foolish purpose. He tells us that He created us, humans, for the purpose of worshiping Him, Alone and without any partners.


 6. "Is God pure, good, loving and fair? - If so, then where does evil, hatred and injustice come from?"

 Answer:
Allah tells us that He is Pure, Loving, and absolutely Just in every respect. He says that He is the Best of Judges. He also tells us that the life that we are in is a test. He has created all the things that exist and He has created all that happens as well. There is nothing in this existence except what He has created. He also says in the Qur'an that He created evil (although He is not evil). He is using this as one of the many tests for us.


 7. "Does God really have power of things? - If so, then why does He let people become sick, oppressed and die?"

 Answer:
Oppression is something that Allah forbids for Himself to do to anyone and He hates it when anyone oppresses someone else. He does have absolute power over everything. He allows sickness, disease, death and even oppression so that we can all be tested in what we do.


 8. "Can you prove there is a God?"

 Answer:
Can you prove that you exist? 
Yes, of course you can. You merely use your senses to determine that you can see, hear, feel, smell, taste and you have emotions as well. All of this is a part of your existence. But this is not how we perceive God in Islam. We can look to the things that He has created and the way that He cares for things and sustains us, to know that there is no doubt of His existence.

Think about this the next time that you are looking up at the moon or the stars on a clear night; could you drop a drinking glass on the sidewalk and expect that it would hit the ground and on impact it would not shatter, but it would divide up into little small drinking glasses, with iced tea in them? Of course not.

And then consider if a tornado came through a junkyard and tore through the old cars; would it leave behind a nice new Mercedes with the engine running and no parts left around? Naturally not.

Can a fast food restaurant operate itself without any people there? That's crazy for anyone to even think about.

After considering all of the above, how could we look to the universe above us through a telescope or observe the molecules in a microscope and then think that all of this came about as a result of a "big bang" or some "accident?"

Again, Eizah si Jiwang Karat = ='

Hi guys. Assalamualaikum. :)

Yeahhh.. tiba-tiba rasa nak menaip draft entry pulak malam ne. Semua gara-gara cik Izzah Fauzi yang sibuk dok kata blog aku membosankan. “How could she!”

So, what I’m going to talk about? *monologdalaman

I don’t really have a proper idea about what to type. Seriously. So aku rasa aku akan tulis je tentang apa yang terjadi sepanjang hari ini; hari Jumaat – 23/11/12. That’s going to be easier.

[#np Terlanjur Cinta – Pasha & Rossa]

Pagi tadi aku bangun. And automatically aku check handphone aku yang ada sebelah aku. jeng jeng jeng ~ “I got the message with the red symbol!!!” FINALLY -,- after I’ve waited all night, act. But IDK why, I am not that excited dengan kiriman mesej tersebut. Mungkinkah sebab faktor kesihatan aku yang agak merosot lately? Taktahu lah pulak kan. Or maybe sebab aku agak frust menunggu the whole night, semalam? Mungkin jugaklah. That moment dalam kepala ne, aku fikir... “He’s late. Too late even I’ve waited untill 1:30 

am” *hampa.

Aku putuskan untuk ignore mesej tu. Sebab setelah aku fikir semasak-masaknye, aku dapat satu teori neh. Kalau aku reply pon, it’s a late reply after 3 hours. Dia mesti tak ada modal nak re-reply me back. Besar kemungkinan kalau aku reply pon, I’ll text after sehari suntuk. Konon nak menunjukkan yang aku taklah teghingin sangat nak ber-conversation dgn dia. And because of that, I think  it’ll be another a whole night before dia mesej aku. And perhaps aku pon akan ambil about a whole night before I could reply. Maybe dia mesej aku Cuma sekadar nk ikut syarat je. I am his friend right? Aku pulak akan reply dgn lambat-lambatnye untuk mengelakkan dia assume aku suka dia; untuk buat-buat biasa like ‘your text isn’t a big matter to me laaa’ *actuallyitisbig.

Conclusion terakhir yang aku ambil adalah AKU TAK TEXT DIA. Cuz of what? Sebab aku tak sanggup nak bermesej dgn dia kalau I’ve to wait for every one whole night untuk conversation tuu berlangsung. I can’t wait that long just to satisfy myself – having conversation with my crush. It is so not me and kind of unberable.

But YKW... to don’t have any conversation with him in a day is something that almost unbearable too. Korang akan cakap aku pathetic. But still, that is seriously what had happened. I am weak and I don’t deny it. But at least, I am learning to be strong even the step taken is much too slow.

Untuk tidak bermesej adalah respon aku sendiri terhadap mesej dia yang macam nak-tak-nak je bermesej aku. Untuk tidak bermesej adalah usaha aku sendiri untuk tidak memberikan harapan pada diri aku. Untuk tidak bermesej adalah langkah berjaga-jaga aku yang dapat agak dia takkan suka aku punya laaa. Pon begitu, untuk tidak bermesej dan terus tidak bermesej, taklah mudah sangat untuk aku ne. Frankly, sebab aku rindu. TETTTT jiwangkarat di situ*lbeypulakaku.

Pagi sampai tengah hari tu aku boleh go on lagi dengan decision aku memandangkan aku menyibukkan diri aku doing chores and so many other things. Masuk petang, aku dah mula goyah and bosan juga sebenarnya. Bila nak masuk malam ~ aku ubah pendirian aku. my heart keep telling me, "Just another text from you then I'll stop ignoring." Hahhh, nampak tak, betapa rapuhnya perasaan aku time neh? 

So before, aku betul-betul buat mende tuh which obviously means that I am not strong, aku akan jadi perigi cari timba and aku akan mesej je dgn dia, pretend like we shared the same feeling .... aku cepat-cepat send a so called SOS message kepada member-member yang dipercayai. pendek je mesej tu. It is just a symbol of "TT..TT" aku send dekat Ain KZ, Izzah Fauzi, Wafa Fauzi, Mardhiyah, and Aqem (I am kind of trust him sebab aku respek sikap dia and memandangkan aku kenal dia lebih awal daripada member laki yang laen) But unfortunately, on that critical moment yang mana aku dah almost burst into tears.. Tak ada sorang pon yang reply my SOS mcg. Lebih menyakitkan jiwaraga apabila maxis informed me yang mcg cannot be delivered sbb terdapat beberapa org member bertuah aku neh swicth off handphone. AIGOO ~

Aku tak kira, I still need to talk to someone. Mungkin kalau dapat nasihat daripada seseorang yang lebih tua, that'll be much better. So I've decided to call Raudhoh Pirzan; my beloved lovely cousin.

Sebaik sahaja Odah pick up the call, aku dah menangis, Gediks right? act. time tuu aku nangis sebab rindukan Syahida. Mana taknya, tiba-tiba abah talk about her and all the moment we've once shared together with her. It deeply touched me. Sudahnya feeling rindu Syahida and kekusutan kerana dia jadik bercampur. Makin haru lahh jadinyeh.

blax3 ~ and yadax3 ~ cakap dengan Odah buat aku tak tensed sangat. Even aku tak cerita betul-betul apa yang terjadi atau apa yang aku rasa (sebab memang segan nak cerita tak tahu macam mana nak luahkan.) Dapat borak dengan dia pon dahh memadai. Thanks to you Odah :)

so malam tuu aku pon okay akhirnye. Tapi taklah okay secara keseluruhannya. err ~ tapi Alhamdulillah, lebih okay dari sebelumnya. 

Time tgh layan Maharaja Lawak Mega with the whole family downstairs, Izzah Fauzi pulak call. And yeahhh.. dgn dia aku lebih opened siked untuk bercerita. Sabar je lahh aku, dalam segan-segan aku nak bercerita and dengan mood yang frust + broken hearted, Izzah Fauzi sempat lagi nak usik sakat and membahan aku. Cess = =' And panjang berborak, kitorang dapati we've something in common about our love story. Izzah always a step ahead from me. Apa yang dia alami and rasa kind of sama je dengan aku. Tapi dia punya masa depan dalam bab nehh vivid manakala aku punya sangat vague. Hmph ~

I used this what I called Muslim's Yellow Pages on my critical moment, seriously

Ok guys, ini je yang aku nak share. Again, Thanks to everyone yang respon mesej aku. AIN KZ pong ada reply. aku sangat hargainya. sebab tuu last kredit dia. even tak dapat borak and buat sesi luahan perasaan dengan dia, aku tahu dia paham sangat apa yang melanda member dia sorang ne. Thanks for your understanding Ain Kamarozzaman.

Thanks for reading. *jika ada yang membaca laa*

Till we meet again.

ADIOS

Assalamualaikum wbt.

SUBHANALLAH, I love this song!

You came to me in that hour of need

When I was so lost, so lonely

You came to me took my breath away

Showed me the right way, the way to lead

You filled my heart with love

Showed me the light above

Now all I want Is to be with you

You are my one true love

Taught me to never judge

Now all I want Is to be with you

[ Lyrics from: http://www.lyricsmode.com/lyrics/s/sami_yusuf/you_came_to_me.html ]

CHORUS (x2): ALLAHUMA! Sal 'ala Sayideena Mustafa

'Alaa Habeebika Nabieeka Mustafa

(O God! Send Your Blessings upon our leader, the chosen one (Muhammad (peace upon him))

Upon Your Beloved, Your Prophet, the chosen one)

You came to me in a time of despair

I called on you, you were there

Without You what would my life mean?

To not know the unseen, the worlds between

For you I'd sacrifice

For you I'd give my life

Anything, just to be with you

I feel so lost at times

By all the hurt and lies

Now all I want Is to be with you

CHORUS (x2)

Showed right from wrong

Taught me to be strong

Need you more than ever

Ya Rasul ALLAH (O Messenger of God (Muhammad (peace be upon him))

You came to me

In that hour of need

Need you more than ever

Ya Rasul ALLAH

You filled my heart with love

Showed me the light above

Now all I want is to be with you

You are my one true love

Taught me to never judge

Now all I want Is to be with you

CHORUS (currently X2)

Laa Ilaaha Illallah

I'm done reading this article by NAYZAK. So it's your turn now. InsyaAllah, yang baik jadikan bekalan.. Mana-mana yang tak baik tolak tepi. Wallahu'alam

 1. "If God created everything - then who created God?" (May Allah forgive me for this stupid question)

 Answer:
According to the Qur'an, Allah tells us that He is the only creator and sustainer of all that exists and that nothing and no one exists alongside Him, nor does He have any partners. He tells us that He is not created, nor is He like His creation in anyway. He calls Himself by a number of names and three of them are:
A) The First - (Al-Awwal)
B) The Last - (Al Aakhir)
C) The Eternal, who is sought after by His creation, while He has no need from them at all. (As-Samad)
so, the answer to the question "Who created God?" is "no one created him".
the answer to the question "What was before the God?" is "nothing, since the God was the first"
Allah has always existed and He never was created, as He is not like His creation, nor similar to it, in any way.

 2. "How can you believe in God, when you can't see, hear, touch, smell, taste or even imagine what He is?"

 Answer:
We know from the teachings of the last prophet of Islam, Mohammed -Peace and blessings be upon him- that no one has ever actually seen God - at least not in this lifetime. Nor are we able to use our senses to make some kind of contact with Him. However, we are encouraged in Islam to use our senses and our common sense to recognize that all of this universe could not possibly come into existence on its own. Something had to design it all and then put it into motion. That is beyond our ability to do, yet it is something that we can understand.

We don't have to see an artist to recognize a painting, correct? So, if we see paintings without seeing artists painting them, in the same way, we can believe that Allah created everything without having to see Him (or touch, or hear, etc.).



 3. "Can God do anything? - Can He make a rock so big that nothing can move it? - If He did make a rock so big that nothing could move it, would that mean that He couldn't move it too? Or would it be impossible for Him to make something so big that He couldn't move it?"

 Answer:
Allah tells us that "Allah is capable of doing anything that He Wills to do." He can make a rock (or anything for that matter) that is so large or heavy that nothing in the entire universe can move it. As regards Allah "moving" it, He is not in the universe and He does not resemble His creation. Whenever He wants anything done, He merely says "Kun! Fayakun!" (Be! And so it will be!)

TAKDIR + TAWAKAL

Assalamualaikum dan Salam Satu Malaysia 
Selamat malam kalian (aku draft post ne waktu mlm)

Err.. This is my first time buat draft directly from h andphone u di-publish dlm blog. So I hope you guys pepaham je laa kalau ada bnyk typo atau entry kalini mcm messy siked.

Sekarang ne dkt Taman Ramal Suria dan sekitarnya tgh hujan. Standard lah kan, di penghujung tahun ne.. Kalau petang tak hujan, malam mesti hujan punya. InsyaAllah, hujan yang turun mencurah ke bumi itu adlh tnda rahmat Nya dan merupakan simbolik rezeki utk kita semua. Wallahu'alam. Time-time macam ne pong org kata antara waktu yg diperkenankn doa. Heee~ sama-sama lah kita berdoa yer. ^^ Soal diperkenankan atau tidak, itu hak Allah yang Maha Kuasa. *bismillahirrahmanirrahim*

 Aku bukan lah nk cerita banyak bab takdir bagai. Tapi terasa nk cakap beberapa perkara yang berkaitan dgn nya. Itu shj. So, if I am mistaken in whatever I'm going to say or share after this.... Sila lah tegur, toksah segan-segan.

My umi dah lama sakit kaki actually. It was right after my late sis - Syahida meninggal and there's a time it's getting worse sampaikan umi terpaksa bertongkat utk mengajar di sekolah. And now, it's getting so much better, alhamdulillah.

But however... As the test of blood, urine and blax3 came out yesterday, didapati bahawa sakit yang menimpa umi neh... Dtg bersamanya beberapa simptom penyakit Rheumatoid Arthritis (AR) frankly, I didn't acknowledge langsung whether that AR is a critical disease or what. But sooner as I went through reading informations about the disease on internet, I realize it is an autoimmune disease which is almost close to Lupus (SLE). But still, different la. And bila sebut SLE, entah knp but I am kinda phobia towards it. Well, mybe sbb disease tu ada kaitan dgn my late sister agknye. Hmph..  and sbb ia dlm group disease yg complex n berat gk sbnrnyeh.

Makanya... Tentulah after I acknowledge few things related to AR like I've said before, I am worried about my umi. She's not sick with such of disease. Yet it is just the symptoms. But still kinda burdensome to think of it out of my concerned. Abah's word keep on repeating it self in my head, "kuasa takdir mengatasi segala-galanya. Kita dah pernah diuji sekali masa syahida sakit dulu. Mungkin ini pun satu bntuk ujian yg memerlukn kita usaha dan tawakal srta lbey taqarrub dgn NYA."  

Be prepared for what will come in the future. 

The best thing I see we could ever do is ikhtiar and tawakal.

Even it is so, I won't deny somewhere inside me is damn so afraid that things will get to the worse and we'll have to face the problem the way we did before. I mean to lose someone you love and experienced it once again is kinda pain even to think of it  Aku tak maksudkan apa yg terjadi dkt syahida akn jd dkt umi. Haih~ Na'uzubillahimindzalik. Aku selalu doa yg terbaik. But it is just, I am scared to face it if it's going to be as unexpected as before.

Sebagai seorang yang tahu hakikat bhwa Allah maha Kuasa dan ada rahsia di sebalik setiap percaturannya, aku 100% setuju kata-kata abah , takdirNYA mengatasi segala-galanya. Najwa Huda pulak kate tawakal adlh kuasa yang besar. And AKU conclude-kan... Untuk menghadapi takdirNYA perlu tawakal. Penyerahan diri dan usaha itu perlu seiring, seia, sekata. 

Btol tak?? I'll keep it in my head anyway. Err... Guys, wanna ask u for a sec, Mesti korang pening kan dgn penyampaian entry kalini? Sbb ak pong pening. Haha. Mentang-mentang la dah lama tak berbloging, my typing skill  had turned upside down. *poyojeh*

Actually point yang aku nk kongsi dlm entry ne adlh tntg kebimbangan aku,  which aku sebenarnya masih agk coward to even think too far, to the worse what might happen. Agk takut kalau sekiranya sesuatu yg aku taknak, terjadi dua kali.. aku akn jatuh n takmampu bangkit. Eceh. Tu je sbnrnye - risau. 

Guys, this not-so-long-but-still-a-long entry will end here. Not sure korang paham ke tak entry yg cacamerba bhsanye neh. and yes, membosankan sbb takde gambar bagai. sori and BTW, aku mintak, korang pong doa-doa lah supaya tak ada apa yang serius sgt tntg sakit umi aku neh. (Sakit kaki je kann mula-mula tuhh.) Doa sme dgn aku okayh! ^^V

[notakaki] saat abah sebut sebaris firman Allah yang mafhumnya, "dalam al-Quran itu ada rahmat dan penawar"  hati aku berbisik, "yeahh lets stick to it (Quran)"

Assalamualaikum wbt :)

Late Night Nagging - Don't Call Me That Way!

Hi world and Peace be upon you :)

Jyeahh, it's already 0225 hours in the morning.
I'm just finished doing my late night chores - cleaning the kitchen, wash the dishes and etc.
What I'm thinking I'm doing now? It's not like tomorrow is holiday or I'm taking a day off.
Actually I am not satisfied about something.
And that's maybe the main reason why I am updating my blog right now; at this moment.

People,
will you guys stop calling me with something I don't belong to.
YKW, I realized that since in elementary school until this present time.. other people like to give nicknames for me. My elementary schoolmate did call me pizza and tol just because it sounds similar to Eizah and Farhatul. They keep teasing me and of course, I hate it damn so much.
I love my name given by my parents. It has a nice meaning which means 'shines of happiness honor'.

But kids back then makes me hate my own name because they keep, giving me a bad title. -,-  I am std six on that time and get easily touched by so many things especially the worst one. so to be frank, I cried once because of this matter. LOL,

Anyway I thought that, as I am already a grown up teenager.. people wouldn't do this stuff - giving bad title or mocking my name etc. But still, it happens. This what I'm going to complaint about.
Lalalala~

Calling me Salam even my name is Eizah. What's the point??? *emotional people get emo* I don't even close to that so called Salam lahh -..-" Perhaps that, whoever calling me that way doesn't meant to hurt me. Maybe it just for fun and jokes. Kinda. At first, I am taking this matter lightly, no biggie. But as time flies, making fun of me doesn't make me fun at all. I got humiliated. It's quite much.

Not just that... Calling me 'sotong' out of nowhere. It's quite embarrassing . Seriously. But as people whom calling me that way are friends of mine, so ignore it. That's a joke too right? No hard feelings please.
But as I realized that the 'sotong' is actually suits me so well because it's related to my weaknesses - being too flexible and for my awful body language, I got mad. Not mad actually but a little bit offended.
Said umi, "Kalau kawan kita hormat kita, dia takkan gelar kita sesuatu yang kita tak suka. Tambah pulak gelaran tu diberi disebabkan kelemahan kita. Seorang kawan takkan gelakkan kawan dia kerana kelemahannya" *ouch* and that's the moment I started to think that I don't like to be called that way, seriously.

The latest nickname among the others is to be called 'mak mah'.
me, mak Mah? What the.... o..O Calling me that way and let the whole class knowing it sarcastically. This is too much lah. He called me that way and in the mean time, still calling me Salam - this so a burdensome. I'm not that stressed just to think about this 'nicknames' stuff which I dislike. But it's partially affected me when I got called the way I don't want to, on the moment it happened. My confident level dropped drastically and I even don't have courages to stand in front and give my own opinion in the class. I assumed that I am getting called mak Mah out of my clumsiness. I thought so. It's my bad being clumsy.

Anyway guys, take note this, whether it is logic or not, that so called given title to me or even the title suits me damn pretty well.. don't call me with something I don't want to and don't belong to. If it's for jokes and fun, don't be too much or I'll offense and hate it.

Guys, it seemed I've took a long time to type an entry. This is my first own-made entry in English. So if there's any mistake or error in grammar and etc. I am so sorry because it happened that I'm not good in English. Err.. *awkward face*

Finished on, 0324 hours. I bet umi must get mad knowing that I'm not sleep yet and tomorrow might be my sleepy-day ever !

Morning Malaysian and Good Night Eim and Hanan :)

This entry is sponsored by BLOGGER.COM and empowered by GOOGLE TRANSLATE
Assalamualaikum, Adios.

Eizah Membebel untuk Hanan dan Izzah Fauzi

Assalamualaikum..
Hello ada orang tak???

Sekarang neh dah pukul 5 petang (waktu Malaysia) and hari Jumaat.
Finally aku berblogging semula setelah agak lama tak menaip entry.
Semua gara-gara sibuk melayan twitter, kononnya.

Melihat kepada situasi aku mengapdet blog ne, paham-paham je lahh yang bahawasanya
twitter dan pesbuk aku pada saat ini tersangat membosankan.

Apa yang aku nak cerita...
Hari ne aku rasa kosong, lost, takde soul and takde live langsung.
kerja aku seharian, bangun, ngemas rumah, solat, makan dan tidur. balik-balik menda ne jeh yang
aku dok ulang tayang. Bukan aku tak cuba study dan buat revision bagai.
Asal nak membaca jeh.... mata aku time-time tu jugaklah nak terasa beratnyeh.
last-last, tertidurlah aku bertemankan buku-buku. Dramatik, bukan?

Semenjak dua menjak ne tahap kerajinan aku dah berkurang sangat-sangat.Tak boleh macam ni! Periksa STPM sem 1 tinggal lagi kurang sebulan. Aku tak patut hilang fokus.
Aduhai.. tak lain tak bukan sebab aku dipengaruhi dgn emosi yang tersangat tak stabil - siked-siked nak patah hati. Pantang nampak muka dia rasa nak mengamuk je. Dia tak buat salah pon. Aku sendiri rindu sangat dkt dia. Tapi sbb tak boleh terima situasi skrg - yang aku dengan dia dah tak rapat cam dulu, aku bajet emo je memanjang depan dia.

Izzah betul. Aku je yang melebih-lebih layan perasaan aku. Sepatutnya aku buat macam takde pape yang berlaku. emh, tapi aku betul-betul tak boleh buat biasa. My bad!!
Dia text adik aku. Aku tak marah. Cemburu mungken? waduhhh.. childish gile aku, macam sakai -,- . Dia rasa aku dah tak wujud ke? Dia sedar tak yang dia text tuu adek aku? Apesal dia buat adek aku tuu macam adek dia? So stupid. Senyap-senyap aku stalk jugak conversation diorang. Rindu doe. Err.. aku, bajet jual mahal lepas tu bila dia ignore aku, mulalah aku buat assumption and perseption yang bukan-bukan. huduh sungguh perangai.

I AM HOPELESS BUT HOPING

Bila dia jauh beberapa meter depan aku, senyap-senyap aku ngusya dia. pehh.. dah gaya stalker handalan, mengalahkan junior bila aku ngusya *malunyeh*. Tapi bila dia dpn aku, punyalah nak avoid eye sight, kononnya.. aku buat-buat tak kenal dia pulakss. *hampehpunyabudak*
Lebih teruk lagi, bila dia bercakap dengan aku face to face, boleh pulak aku angkat paper tinggi-tinggi buat macam dia tak wujud and act rude dekat situ. Aku tak tahu apa yang aku baca dekat paper tu. Act aku baca zero. Act aku nak je berbual dengan dia. tapi bila dia bercakap dengan aku, menda ni lah yang jadi. BTW, YKW.. I even yelled at him once. The reason obviously tak logik langsung. HAILAHHH. Aku taktahu kewarasan aku ke mana time neh.. Apa motif aku???? *stresssendiri*
anyway, apapun yang aku dah buat atau tnjukkan. dia tak pernah respon apa-apa, macam nothing happened. sbnrnye mmg nothing had happened pon. Ouch! nampak tak betapa syok sendirinye aku neh. Alahai.... sadis!

Maaf kpd yang terbaca. Frankly, aku tak rasa pon ada yang terbaca entry ne that's why I am quite berani nk tules mende mengarut like this stuff. kinda. lagipun I am not going to publish this entry on my TL or twitter sbb absolutely  obvious entry kalini lebih kepada catatan hati aku sendiri. Dulu, bila ada prob syok sendiri macam ni.. selalunya I told Hanan or Izzah. Sekarang Hanan dekat Cairo Egypt nun. Macam mana pulakk nk contact. Izzah Fauzi pulak skrg tgh dlm preparation utk exam next week and in additon tgh ada personal prob. No way la I will burdened her with my silly prob neh.

taw tak. there's something funny jadik semalam. Time my sis turun downstairs.. secretly aku stalk conversation dlm phone dia. seriously tak sempat nk stalk hape pon sbb I've took a long time untuk decide nk stalk or not. I felt so immatured doing those things tapi in the same time sgt curious. *takbolehnakelak*
baru seminit dua pegang, my sis dah naik semula. as usual, sbgi seorang yang sangat lemah bab kaver mengkaver neh... tak psl2 tercampak jauh phone tuu. KANTOI. and then my sis expected that I stalk phone dia. She did provoke me saying I am crying for something I didn't do. Penat menafikan. but so sudden... I burst into tears lepas tuh.

Makkkkkk. malunyeh nangis dpn adik sendiri. awuuuu *mencix100!!* I am even clueless macam mana lah boleh tibe-tibe menangis lps kena provoke siked. I bet I can't kept my thaught and frustration for long. Pon begitu, sesungguhnya aku rasa sangat berdosa cry over a guy. Am I bad muslim girl?  tangisan aku adlh kerana miskinnya cnta dan rnduku pd NYA. aku patut menangis kerana DIA instead of dia, right?

oklahh.. aku chiao dulu. habes dah membebel - rasa light siked hatijiweraga neh. huhu.
ASSALAMUALAIKUM wbt

[notakaki] Imran, Thanks sbb pakai baju tshirt ungu tuu. It suits you pretty well, tak tipu. I like you wearing that outfit, seriously agak terharu. err~  aku assumed kau appreciate pemberian aku as you're wearing it. So, thanks again. take care kat sana. wish your out and inside always in peace and calm. jangan sedih-sedih dan enjoy lah bercuti kat Sinai tuu. :)

EntryTengahMalam

Assalamualaiku dan Salam Satu Malaysia

Akhirnya aku ambil keputusan untuk menaip entry pada tengah malam ini.

First of all, sorry for the first pic yang tersangatlah blur. 

Walaupun image-nya tersangatlah vague, but because it is a picture, of the precious moment of mine.. 

so aku terima juga pic itu seadanya.

Bawah tu pulak gamba dengan budak-budak perempuan. Aiseh, usya gamba gini buat aku rindu Hanan and Imran. tapi lebih rindu Hanan lah, sebab tak contact langsung dia lps dia fly tuh.

Exam trial STPM Penggal 1 aku telah berlangsung dengan jayanya untuk tige hari and dah selesai pon. *lega* Soalan untuk semua paper kebanyakannya senang belaka *taktipu* tapi apakan daya, aku nak menjawab tiap-tiap soalan tuh kemain payah lagi. *hampeh* 

Satu, sebab aku demam tahap hardcore time nak periksa tuuu, the other reason pulak sebab aku tgh feeling down sangat at the moment dek pemergian both of my besties and pasal mr.tutttttt and the main reason aku takleh jawab most of the question given, sebab lack of proper preparation and sebab aku ne pemalas tahap gaban.

mula-mula tu bila fikiran aku agak tak betul and time tgh half-hearted, ada gak aku rasa cam nak GIVE UP je dari study bagai neh. tapi lepasNor Wafa Fauzi dah so called lecture, advise and slow talk dengan aku... aku tak jadi lah nak ambil keputusan yang sangat entah hape-hape tuu. 

In addition as a muslim, aku sangat acknowledge bahawasanya menuntut ilmu itu satu tuntutan dalam agama aku. Dengan ilmulah Allah akan mengangkat darjat seseorang itu. Bila kita menuntut ilmu, pada masa tu jugak seluruh isi langit dan di bumi akan mendoakan kita and even if you want both of dunia and akhirat juge perlukan ilmu. Eceh. hebat pulak aku bab teori neh. But practically it doesn't seems to progress very well. 

Nasib baiklah umi aku pon tak putus-putus support anak sulung beliau yang banyak kerenah  and siked-siked nak givap bagai. 

kfine. Dah 0059 hours already. memang esok tak exam tapi tetap perlu ke sekolah awal. I need to go.

Assalamualaikum. selamat tengah malam. Selamat amek tahu pasal perkembangan hidup aku walaupun korang tak peduli. Nitez uguys :)

[notakaki] Hanan and Imran... sekarang ne jam 1902. Kalian tgh buat apa tuu? semoga sihat and sentiasa berada dalam keadaan baik kat sana. take care taw! and BTW Hanan, pe cite hrta peninggalan yang aku bagi dekat kau? suke kah anda akan hadiah dan love letter itu? Handle them with care wokeh. ASSALAMUALAIKUM sekali lg. *peaceyo!*

catatan IMAN untuk NAFSU

Assalamualaikum

Dah lama sangat tak update. Tiba-tiba petang ini terasa nak buat luahan perasaan pulak. Adehh. Aku ni memang penuh dengan emosi sungguh; so typical. 

Anyway  gambar di bawah ini aku ambil dari entry  IKHTILAT by drCINTA  #likesharesangat! 

Selamat membaca luahan aku melalui gambar-gambar di bawah. Eceh.

[notakaki] "Sesungguhnya kepala yg ditusuk dgn besi itu lebih baik drpd menyentuh kaum yang tidak sejenis yg tak halal baginya" (Riwayat at-Tabrani & Baihaqi)

To be frank, aku sangat tersentap dapat tahu tentang diri kau yang sebenarnya. Engkau tahu batas yang Allah dah tetapkan, tapi engkau langgar batas tu. hilang terus respect aku pada kau. Mungkin selama ni, aku meletakkan expectation yang tinggi pada kau #sigh. Yang agama tu sekolahnya je. huhu..

Kenangan aku dengan kau, tak ada apa yang perlu diingatkan lagi. Apa yang sweet-nya dengan dosa? Aduhai, aku mengata diri sendiri dan terasa sendiri. #sakittt.

Aku yakin sangat, sangat. setiap yang ditimpakan oleh Allah (swt), termasuk lah, pengalaman aku dengan kau sebelum ini dan kekecewaan aku sekarang ini ada hikmah yang sangat huge di sebaliknya. Allahu'alam. Berlakunya sesbuah kesilapan supaya kita dapat belajar dan ambil iktibar darinya. Tak gitu? :) 

Bila aku take time and berfikir dengan proper, aku notice one thing.Kita sering berdoa agar Allah datangkan petunjuk NYA utk kita. Tapi bila kita diberi petunjuk, selalu kita yg menolaknya. Perasan tak?

"La Tahzan" Perkara keduniaan tak perlu ditangiskan. 

Akhir sekali, rakan-rakanku, doakan aku istiqamah dalam keputusan yang aku dah ambil ni. Taw, taw :)Tak sanggup aku nak suka seorang lelaki yang tak hormat perempuan. Even it's one sided-liking, still I hate it! okey fine, melebih pulakk #menggelabahjep.

Semoga Allah temukan aku dengan lelaki yang aku perlu, bukan yang aku mahu. Tapi lepas-lepas ni lah. Tak sanggup aku nak ulang salah silap dan kecuaian aku ni. Terlampau leka dengan soal hati sampai pointer tak terjaga. Adehhh.2 minggu lagi trial, aku harap aku dapat overcome weaknesses aku dalam subjek-subjek yang aku ambil. Biarlah pointer untuk trial kalinih BERMARUAH sikit. Betul tak Banzai? haha XD seriously, aku pun nak merasa pointer 3.5 and above. Oh Allah, perkenankanlah.. (amin ya Rabbi) Doakan aku sukses. Assalamualaikum.

Bergambar dengan budak-budak Maahad yang sekarang study di USIM; exceptional for aku and Banzai.

dan satu lagi, BAnzai.. aku mintak ampun sangat utk pose aku yang terlampau candid. #serioussorry. ampunx100!

Ini pulak sesi bergambar dengan Imran. Almaklumlah, orang dah nak terbang jauh. Tak pasal-pasal jadi glamour mengalahkan retis. #eceh. Anyway, THANKS Imran.

TAMAT