Between Work and Weddings

Bismillahirrahmanirrahim...

Assalamualaikum wbt.

(Np Merisik Khabar Akim & Farrah Cover)

Lagi tiga hari yang berbaki. Kesibukan di pejabat dan lebih-lebih lagi kesibukan melakukan persiapan untuk urusan majlis dan kenduri, menjadikan kepala dan hati kedua-duanya tak sempat nak memproses perubahan yang bakal berlaku. Bagusnya, overthinking is being prevented. Kurang bagusnya, aku rasa macam all the thoughts and feels akan dump on me lump-sum bila aku dah terlalu hampir dengan detik-detik bertukar status bujang - berkahwin. 

Macam sekarang, macam dah mula datang segala itu-ini. baru mula nak terfikir dan berfikir semula. New chapter coming orang kata. A co-author is a plus at that. Tak ada siapa menidakkan hakikat, bahawa rumah tangga itu tidak semata-semata smooth sailing sahaja. I am fully aware. Dan tak ada pula orang yang tak mengharapkan keindahan dan kebahagiaan dalam sebuah perkahwinan. Harapan tertinggi tetap untuk sebuah kebahagiaan. Theoretically, I know these two have to merge melalui tawakkul 'alallah. tawakal yang akan merendahkan expectations terhadap kesempurnaan dan yang akan menguatkan ikhtiar ke arah bahagia sampai syurga. 

Hustle and Hassle

Assalamualaikum wbt.

Remember when it was just several months ago, I wrote that it is hard to leave a good company. 

Here some more., an interesting finding.. "it is harder to leave a bad one."

I am feeling anxious and furious rn. Anxious of what else to come next and furious about what is currently happening. Not to mention, the frustration piling up as my trust being broken and shattered to pieces. 

"Huallah, Allahu Rabbi, laa syariikalah"

What happened today is way out of my plan. 6 months ago, I would never know this would have happened. 

I took up the offer to teach in an international school given my passion to teach. Only then to know that it is quite new in the scene for yet than a year . The offer came right after my engagement, sounds much like an opportunity of a great endeavor. As anxious I might have felt leaving the kind bosses, helpful colleagues and my fiance here at my previous job, I ought to break new ground in my career path. henceforth the hard decision. I always believe that there is rezqi in everything and every time, no exception on this one. "chulbal, lets go!!"

Teaching is great! Students are precious and teachers are resourceful. The profession has its own challenges which only make it more attractive to stick to. thus, I pour what I had and adapted. That is, despite the newness of the institution that make it lacking in so many structural form. That being said -  It has no Principal in charge but Deputy Head of the School at that moment, it has (court sorts) cases with its previous terminated-teachers (claiming the teachers are at fault; obviously) The high students turnover (the inability to retain customer), low admission rate with no proper sales and marketing team to take charge of it (but one man-show handled by only 1 personnel - later resigned, then on leveraging the teachers to do marketing and sales), the financial struggle (with some teachers were unpaid up to 4 months) and etc. Way too much of a red flag showing poor business practice by the company/management team. as a result, I got to see colleagues alike resigning from their post along the way because of the inconsistency they felt from the employer. 

Regardless, I still made my way through and through. The students are there to motivate me, so I tolerate and compromise. Ig the dedication was seen and acknowledged for towards the end of my probation period,  I was being awarded The Best Female Teacher for the term, 2022/2023; Alhamdulillah.

But sadly. That is that. when the salary payment (again) was way overdue, I got anxious. and the way management response to the issue, did turned me off big time. No prior notice issued, no meeting held to explain the situation and pointing fingers happened at it best.

I was somewhat did my own digging later on, simply to learnt that the company has not being transparent about 'not paying to my EPF and SOCSO contributions'. They did not pay me full amount, but they also did not contributing. The math is not mathing! No one really response to my inquiries when I revert to them about the issue. Hanky-panky saying that, the contributions will somehow to be made when the financial situation gets better yada-yada. They are toying with me straight on my face, not knowing that I was informed about how the hack things work. I played along, playing dumb. 

I decided to left (too) after so much thinking being done. I considered a lot. but my main drive is that, I did not feel comfortable any longer working. It feels wrong at so many levels, thus I handed my two-weeks notice as per to the contract requirements regarding the resignation procedure. My last date was supposedly to be effective on June 7th, before one sidedly being amended to the end of May (by the school) via whatsapp. To my surprise, I was then verbally and promptly being informed of early released on May 24th (along with guaranteed payment for May).  That was after about 50 minutes of questioning (interrogating?) my decisions and 2 on 1 conversation with the deputy head of school and head of operation personnel. It was quite messed up. Very much unprofessional. 

Fast forward to this day. June 8th 2023 Payment is yet to be paid. Now becoming overdue as the cut date was yesterday (on the 7th of the next salary month). Teachers that are staying had received their shares while it seems that I will have to fight for my rights. My commitments are due. Now after all the hustle, this is a hassle. Upsetting, really. 

p.s. Respectfully, I immediately refer to the HR cum accounting personnel this morning to inquire about my May salary, only to be replied that the matter has to be referred to the Deputy Head of the School (like wht?). Then, when someone (whose in the same shoes as I am) did refer to him as suggested. the deputy head of school said that it is not within his job scope for this so called salary matter (obviously, understood). 

It is always hard to leave a good place

It is always hard to leave a good place. 

But oftentimes, people are leaving anyway hoping that a better place awaits. 

Ditemukan dengan rakan sekerja, majikan yang baik-baik adalah azam (I wrote it as doa in my notebook) tahun lepas. Hendak bekerja sehingga satu tahun lamanya juga turut ditulis sebagai azam (sebab jarang dapat stay lama bila melibatkan ketidakpastian skim kontrak ni, hence the prayers). 

Alhamdulillah. I hope it is not too much to claim that my prayers are heard and granted. Ngam-ngam pada awal Januari 2022 dapat kerja di BTM. Memang baik-baik semuanya dari persekitaran kerja sehinggalah ke warga kerjanya juga. What is the odd in meeting good coworkers, seniors and bosses? The chances are slim. Lebih-lebih lagi setelah one traumatic working experience in 2021. Especially when people these days are under pressure of meeting goals and performances. or probably dek pengalaman kerja aku sendiri yang tak seberapa ada menjadikan diri sendiri sedikit pesimis. Professionalism might even kills the courtesy, ngl. But alhamdulillah all over again, this working experience of mine, at this place, this time turned out to be a good one.

Seksyen yang baru, guided by ketua seksyen terpaling berpengalaman dalam jabatan. Very insightful, charismatic while in the same time approachable enough dengan anak buah. Mother-like gitu. As soon as in the first week of working, I got to be included to celebrate her birthday together with the whole section. Masa tu la getting all these positive impression (proven over time) terhadap semua orang. What I saw is courtesy and consideration being practiced despite all the working efficiency alike. 

Dapat desk-mate yang I would consider a soulmate kalau dia lelaki means we really did click along especially from my POV. Heh. We will never run out topic to discuss. Be it academically, or gossips alike. Dia punya brainstorm tu memang level otw buat Phd lol. I keep no secrets with her, as much as I could recall. Apa-apa cerita je di rumah memang ended up akan terluah muntah jugak. A different kind of transparency and chemistry from how I have it with colleagues from either degree days or during schools. Shout out to Anis Hamizah for all the times we spent while working together. It is a pleasant one which I hope she feels no less than me too (fingers crossed). I am fortunate that we somehow  were accepted and came into BTM in pairing. Imagine if not, aku yang canggung ni memang tak ke mana lah sampai ke sudah. 

Aku rasa tempat ni memang very takdir-like. Magical gitu. Not that it is perfect. But beautiful enough to recall to. over all, I ought to see this place as to where I rebound after  teruk kerja mystep syarikat sendirian-berhad sebelumnya. A rebound for my lonely loveless life juga because I met him here. I literally just came in to meet some new strangers with kind heart (new knowledge input is bonus) and meeting my jodoh (in shaa Allah) before moving out and growing again. January-February last year was actually especially rough. Perhaps because of the emotional distress I got from tempat lama in 2020, I was somehow ttiber feeling lost pulak. Centulah. Thus this place has done its healing part on me.

Long story short, esok dah hari terakhir bekerja. Alhamdulillah untuk 1 tahun, 1 bulan dan 10 hari yang baik-baik. Dalam rasa syukur, sesungguhnya lebih rasa berat rasa hati. Semoga orang baru di tempat baru nantipun baik-baiklah macam yang di tempat lama ini, hendaknya. Anxious (sangat) sebenarnya. Moga boleh bagi yang terbaik dan saling berbagi nilai seperti diniatkan. Moga menjadi rezeki; kerja baru yang berkat, kenalan baru yang welcoming, membantu dan baik hati budi serta ilmu baru yang manfaat. Fuhh aamiinkanlah banyak-banyak kali. 

It is a good place, because of it's good people. 

P.s. I am so sorry that I am still lacking in so many ways throughout the year while working here. Takdan nak kenal semua dan tidak helok mana juga. Tak rasa macam disukai semuapun. Hanya banyak menuai baik budi dan tunjuk ajar dari orang lain. Semoga semua yang baik-baik Allah balaskan dengan berganda-ganda lagi kebaikan di sisi-NYA.